My wife and I operate an estate sales service operation. That connects us to a lot of interesting people and most of the time it inserts us into a difficult time in their life. There are many occasions that the family has lost someone or that a senior mother and/or father are moving into assisted living facility or nursing home. There is an abundance of anxiety, sentiment, frustration and simply being overwhelmed. Recently, I met a man who was attending one of our sales, his name is Fred Becker. He approached me and asked about how to go about setting one up. He told me that he wasn’t in a hurry but he wanted to get the process started soon. Then he continued to tell me his story.

Three years ago, on a day just like any other day, Fred and his wife Louise took a drive to go to the store. In a flash, his life would tragically change forever. At 11 am in the morning as he turned onto the road that led to the store a drunk driver traveling 88 miles per hour hit him broadside. His wife was killed instantly and he suffered severe injuries and was flown to Chicago for treatment. Fred survived, but his journey forward was not going to be easy; physically and emotionally. It would challenge him personally, his family, and everything in his life. I didn’t know what to say.

It was only a week later when Fred called. He wanted to set up an appointment to talk about what was involved with setting up an estate sale. He still said that he wasn’t in a hurry but his timeline did shorten a bit. We arrived at his house for the meeting and upon walking into the home I was astonished. It was absolutely beautiful. It was extremely clean, clutter free, and organized. I certainly did not expect that from a single man living by himself. Fred took us on a tour of the house and every room was ornately decorated with figurines, Norman Rockwell collection, photos with all sorts of things blended nicely into the fabric of the home. When I commented on the surroundings, he gave all of the credit to Louise. He followed up the comment by saying it was all just stuff. He had moved on to more important things.

Next, he took us outside. It had to be one of the most beautiful landscaped yards I have had the pleasure to visit. Over 400 types of plants, shrubbery, colors, ornaments. It was an amazing sanctuary. Once again, he gave all the credit to his wife. We all sat down at one of his tables outside to discuss the estate sale project. It was hard for me to keep my attention on the topic at hand since I was so taken in by my surroundings. I was also a bit concerned at what it would take to put together an estate sale that would do this home justice.

I don’t remember how the transition to a general conversation happened, but it was smooth. Fred shared more of his story freely. Although his words were laced with sadness, they were supported by a faith, a strong faith in God that kept him with an optimism that could carry him through anything.  Normally, our first meetings with prospective clients take an hour or two. We like to get to know the people we are going to be working for. On this evening, the meeting was shorter, but our time spent talking lasted more than three hours. I could have stayed longer but I didn’t want to overstay our welcome.

Over the next couple of weeks, we put together a plan and presented it to Fred. His timeline kept getting shorter but it was still very workable. We continued to have personal conversations and I would always leave with a deep desire to go the extra mile to make this sale a success. I also kept wanting to hear more.

Finally, I thought to myself that this man has a lot of value to share and I have the opportunity to share it through this magazine. I asked him if he would be willing to do an interview with me. He hesitated at first; I am sure it was because he did not want to be the focus for any achievements. His life is centered around his faith and gratitude with God. That is where he gives the credit.

Fred was born in 1946 in a very small rural community in Illinois west of Chicago. His father was a farmer and his mother was the family caretaker. His parents weren’t religious and didn’t attend church, but they made sure that their kids went to Sunday school. Growing up he worked hard on the farm and in his spare time he liked to hunt and fish and he participated in the high school track and football team.

After high school, Fred attended The Rockford Business College with the intention of becoming an accountant. He transferred to the Marycrest Business College in Kankakee, Illinois and graduated in 1967. His professional career started as a bank teller, but it wasn’t long before he moved to an accounting position with an accounting firm in Peru Illinois. Shortly thereafter he moved back to Kankakee to join Amberg File Company as an accountant. He was promoted to an office manager and treasurer position. Fred had every intention of becoming a CPA but that would take another 5 years of schooling.

That was when an opportunity to work for a company that was going to pay him as much as a CPA and make that right away without having to go back to school. His job was to be an accountant for a firm that handled mechanical contractors. He learned a lot about that industry and wondered what was next for him. One of his accounts was a plumbing and heating business that particularly caught his eye. It was a ma and pa business that had been quite successful.

Fred prayed for guidance as to what he should do next. Upon completing his amen, he picked up a national trade magazine and lo and behold, in the back pages was an ad for a plumbing and heating business in Kankakee. It was the same business that had been intriguing him. There was no doubt that this was a direct and clear message for what that next move would be. His faith did not waiver when he had to come up with $100,000 that he didn’t have and was unlikely to be able to get it from a bank. It was 1978 and Fred was 32 years old, married with three children at the time. God provided. The bank called a week later and gave him the loan.

Fred successfully ran the company for 43 years until he retired in April of 2021; just over three months after the tragic accident. The accident wasn’t what sparked his faith, it was the faith that got him through it.

Fred says that he was a bit of a wild young man, but he did know right from wrong. He says it was easy for him to settle down after he met the girl who would become his wife, Louise. “She was a good woman” and having three kids motivated him to be a responsible father. As for going to church, he followed in his parents’ steps-he did not go but he made sure his kids made it to Sunday school every week. Fred says he always had faith in God but it didn’t really manifest until later in his twenties when he met two men from an area church who helped him to understand what it meant to be saved-to profess and believe.

During the tour of his house, I noticed that there were many pictures of dogs. Being an animal lover myself, I had to ask about it. He and his wife Louise were always looking for ways to bring energy into the marriage-keep it fresh and interesting.  He became fascinated with dogs from watching Ronald Reagan return to the White House in his helicopter. The doors would open and they would release his Cavalier King Charles Spaniel. The dog would enthusiastically run up to the President and shower him with love and kisses. There was no question, he had to get one of those dogs for himself. It took him awhile but he finally was able to get his own dog. He and Louise started going to dog shows and joining breeder groups. They loved the socializing and the people they came to know along the way. They became successful in showing and breeding dogs for over thirty years.

Louise also had an interest that she brought into the marriage. It took her awhile, but she was finally able to talk Fred into taking dance lessons at the Arthur Murray School of Dance. It was not something that was on his bucket list. When they started, they were just going to take a few lessons but it didn’t take long before they found that they both enjoyed the dancing and being able to do something together. The more they danced, the more they enjoyed it, the more they enjoyed it, the more active they became. They started meeting great people and entering contests and even winning contests. They kept wanting to learn more. It wasn’t just a hobby; it became a way of life. They enjoyed meeting the instructors and dancing with world champion dancers. As we had toured the house, he showed us many pictures of their events and still had the joy of those times in his voice as he described them. We also came across Louise’s dancing gowns; they were absolutely spectacular.

I didn’t ask as many questions as I usually do. Listening to Fred’s stories and picking up on his joy in life through his faith in God provided me with answers to the questions I didn’t even need to ask. There was one question that his response was quite compelling. When I asked Fred how his values and faith defined his freedom, his response was something you might hear on some TV show, but this was real. At the trial for the drunk driver that killed his wife, when the jury went out for deliberations, they both sat in the courtroom. Fred got up and walked over to the man and told him that he forgave him and held no animosity towards him, then shook his hand. The man was very repentant and cried. Fred told me that doing that was the most freeing he had ever experienced. I asked him if it was hard to do and he responded, “No, it was actually very easy, God was with me and He has never let me down.”

When I write these articles, I do my best to show how we all have value. Sometimes you have to look harder, but it is always there. Forgiveness and forgetting are something that I have personally struggled with as many people do, but Fred Becker made it easy to see. In our current world, there is a lot of hurt going on. In our political arenas, our families and friends, there is division, anger, self-righteousness, and ego. When and if we figure out how to get along and support each other, forgiveness will be a very helpful tool in our world’s reconciliation. I hope that we could all find the courage to act as Fred did and be able to experience the type of freedom that he did. Amen.